June 2006 – Page 2

For Ed

Posted on June 15, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

I am a sucker for those IQ tests that seem to be everywhere on the internet nowadays. I am pretty sure that they are in no way accurate, since if the results were to be believed, I have an IQ in the 160’s. While I like to think that I am smarter than the average bear, I am certainly no Marilyn vos Savant. Still, they are fun to take if for no other reason than to see how much you have forgotten since High School. The last one I took, which was several months ago, had a question on it that was just so horrible I decided to copy it down for further examination. I don’t remember which particular test this question was on, but you find similar on almost every one of these tests, yet never one so horribly put together. Here is the question in question, as it Continue reading For Ed→

Random email

Posted on June 15, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

I got a forwarded attachment today from someone I don’t know. Of course I opened it, how else do antivirus companies stay in business? Actually it was just an email, but it did have a cute little story in it, which I thought I would share: An old man lived alone in the country. He wanted to plant a tomato garden, but it was difficult work, and his only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man described the predicament in a letter to his son. Dear Vincent, I’m feeling bad. It looks like I won’t be able to put in my tomatoes this year. I’m just too old to be digging up a garden. I wish you were here to dig it up for me. Love, Dad A few days later he received a letter from his son. Dear Dad, Sorry I’m not there Continue reading Random email→

(relative) Success

Posted on June 15, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

I like to play small ball when it comes to poker, as detailed in damn near every post I have made regarding the subject. Well, I finally took down my first MTT. That is if you have a very loose definition for the “M” part of it, oh and the second “T” part of it. Okay, more technically accurate, I took down a two table SnG. Come on, people! Baby steps. I was greatly aided in my effort when, three hands into it, I had a J-6 in the big blind, and four people were in the hand. The flop was a Q-J-6 with two clubs. I bet 120 at it (the pot at the time), figuring that someone probably had top pair, and I was sure someone was on a flush draw, but I didn’t think it was likely anyone had two pair; the other blind folded pre-flop, so Continue reading (relative) Success→

Note to self

Posted on June 14, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

I decided to play in the Mookie tournament today, as I had not played any cards yet. I got all signed up for it with a few minutes before it was to start, then started hitting some websites to read up on other people’s take on the WWDN Invitational. Because honestly, reading what other people say about it is damn near as fun as actually playing in it. Unfortunately, I came across the following take on the action at S.t.B.’s website. To quote just one little bit of it: I fought may way back up until I got knocked out with the trips against the boat. MP decided to limp with Q Q instead of raising. They deserved to lose that hand instead of knocking me out. Now, I was the “MP” in that situation, and reading this really irritated me. The whole idea behind poker is deception, right? You Continue reading Note to self→

I played in the WWDN invitational and all I got was this lousy T-shirt

Posted on June 13, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

I played in the WWDN invitational again tonight. This is the highest stake game that I generally play in, and it is just a ten dollar buy in. I did okay I suppose. Unfortunately, I was playing a bit scared at the beginning, and most of that was because Hoyazo was at my table, and I knew that any play I made was likely to end up on his blog. Yes, fear of being embarrassed, that is definitely the way to play poker! I finished the thing in 21st place out of 72, which would bring my average finish to somewhere in the low 20s I think. I still think that is pretty good when you consider just who the competition is at that event. They are mostly all poker bloggers, and not just bloggers that happen to play poker like me; they are mostly poker players who happen to Continue reading I played in the WWDN invitational and all I got was this lousy T-shirt→

A jog down memory mile

Posted on June 13, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

It always seems that it is something random and insignificant that forces to mind memories long suppressed. Even though many of these memories are such a part of your being that you would not be who you are today without them, they have faded into the dark recesses of your mind to slumber, until some chance occurrence forces them back to mind. Whether the memory stirs a sense of embarrassment or achievement, success or failure, it is there and forever will be, waiting only for that one seemingly insignificant event to once again break it from its cell. So as I saw the jogger beside the road today, I didn’t think anything of it. There are frequently joggers along the road, I probably see them almost daily; so often that I don’t even really notice them when they are there. Why it was that today, out of all of the Continue reading A jog down memory mile→

I suck, evidently

Posted on June 12, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

I have been actively looking for a job for well over a month now, as opposed to the first month where I was significantly more concerned with completing home repairs than actually finding a new job, and I am starting to get just a wee bit depressed. When I was a teenager, I never had to worry about finding a new job because, well, I got every job that I interviewed for. I thought that my perfect record for interviews would translate over to my current job search, but I was sadly mistaken. I guess when you are a teenager looking for a job, where the employees are actually looking for a teenager, it is really a lot different; If you show up in clean clothes and freshly showered, you have already eliminated a good 70% of the field. That doesn’t seem to hold true as an adult. I have Continue reading I suck, evidently→

More poker goodness

Posted on June 11, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

Fresh off of my amazing streak last night, I entered a couple of MTTs this morning. One was a 45 person, $1 buy in, the other was an 18 person $1.50 buy in. I didn’t play particularly well in either one of them, but I was able to cash in both. The 18 person one I finished in fourth, which was just enough to cover the buy in, and possibly buy a soda if I could get one for about .45 cents. I did a bit better in the 45 person one. Here I must note that I am generally much better in single table sit and go’s than I am in MTTs. There is just something about getting moved from table to table that seems to keep me from getting into any real rhythm. Today was no different, but the distraction of having the 18 player tourney going for Continue reading More poker goodness→

Bored on a Saturday

Posted on June 10, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

There is a radio ad playing on my local radio station, I think it is for Ultimate Electronics, although I can’t find anything on their website or google to support my claim. Anyway, the commercial goes on to say that your t.v. isn’t simply a t.v., it is a personal theater where “gifted thespians like Steven Seagal ply their craft”. I don’t know why, but that just makes me laugh every time I hear it. Speaking of Steven Seagal, he was in a new movie that came out last week. Shadow Man was a direct to video release (like every Seagal film should have been), that I happened to catch a couple of scenes from. All I can say is wow. It has been so long since I have actually seen Seagal in a movie that I had completely forgotten just how bad he is at acting. I do see Continue reading Bored on a Saturday→

Holy shit!

Posted on June 10, 2006 by Shadowtwin — No Comments ↓

During a bout with boredom sometime last week, I went ahead and tuned one of my guitars and plucked away at it a bit. Surprisingly, or perhaps not, the only things that I could remember how to play, and actually still play with only minor mistakes, were all from Metallica’s Black Album. Of course I did spend thousands and thousands of hours playing that when I was a teen. I dug out my old Yngwie Malmsteen tabliture book for the Rising Force album and and started trying to play Black Star again, it has been an awful long time since I attempted that song. Anyway, while I had a pretty good idea what the song sounded like, I couldn’t remember it exactly. So I went to you tube to see if I could find a video of it. Well, I found a video of it, but I also found this Continue reading Holy shit!→

Metallica - One

Citing Metallica's song 'One' as 'music lost to history' probably doesn't make much sense to most. In this case, I don't think the song is lost to history, but the video is.

When this video dropped (I'd guess it was about 1989) I thought it was the most powerful video I had ever seen. Now, nearly thirty years later, I still believe it is the most powerful music video ever made.

The story may not be completely unique (the imagery is recycled -but from a film that was so old that my -then fifteen or sixteen year old- eyes had never seen. My now forty-five-ish year old eyes had never seen it either) but that video is shot and edited so well that you will be crying by the end. If, that is, you have a heart.

The video for Metallica's One surpassed all expectations for music videos, set the mark for what music videos would, could, and should be. It rocketed the group from garage band to the biggest group that ever lived. This single video defines not just that band, but the entire genre.

No other video has ever had such an impact on on the world of music. Not Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' video (which I believe to this day gets far too much credit) not The Beastie Boys song Sabotage which was a wonderful throwback to the seventies era cop show, but which I believe, also gets credit far beyond it's worth. Metallica's video for One, on the other hand, didn't try to look like anything more than it was. It was a hard-rocking song and Metallica used some masterful movie clips to add to the morose feel that the instruments generated. That video, for that song, was absolutely perfect.

It is without any form of doubt that I say the video for Metallica's song One was, and ever will be, the best video ever made. Don't take my word for it though, watch the video above (with low light and in a dark room) . If it doesn't move your heart, you're living this life all wrong.

July 2017

Cancer: 6/22-7/22
For 34 years you have been painstakingly removing a single hair from the head of each of woman you murder -with plans to weave them into a belt. A mishap involving a a candle-warmer, a vacuum cleaner, and the police breaking down the door to take you 'dead or alive' will bring your collecting days to an unfortunate end.

Leo: 7/23-8/22
Your plan to rook your boyfriend into marrying you by faking a pregnancy will fail this week. There are several reasons why this plan will fail: 1) you have denied him sex for your entire relationship, promising him that flower on the honeymoon. 2) You actually are pregnant. 3) You've been wearing a T-shirt that says 'Gold Digger' on it since the day you met him. 4) The single strand of hair that the Cancer (horoscope above) pulls from your head will be the one and only time he leaves his own DNA at the crime scene.

Virgo: 8/23-9/22
Okay, maybe the stars have been a bit harsh. They know you are a good guy, but you've made a lot of mistakes. The stars are willing to meet at Gina's Coffee Shop on July 12th at noon. If you aren't there, you may as well write off visitation of your kids.

Libra: 9/23-10/22
98% That is the specific number you will give your wife before you jump out of the plane. That optimistic chance of survival will slowly fade as you realize that gravity doesn't care a great deal if you have your arms out or not: Terminal velocity is terminal velocity. Your attempt to recreate the famous scene from the movie Point Break will end just as it should have in the movie: A horrible mass of flesh and bone several miles away from the guy who actually did have the parachute.

Scorpio: 10/23-11/21
The stars have a huge "to do" list. As such, your childhood wish to have sex with Anna Nichole Smith will finally come true this week. No, there's no way to stop it. The stars do apologize for the lateness of the fulfillment of this request, but they think your friends will count it anyway.

Sagitarius: 11/22-12/21
You've seen the movie The Number 23 exactly twenty-two times. You've built your life around avoiding that number. You''ll feel supremely confident when you leave your house on 07/12/2017. But, on 07/12/2017, you will step onto the sidewalk only to be struck and killed by a drunk driver. The time of impact? Exactly 11:01:00am on 07/12/2017. You will have exactly enough time to add up the digits of the date AND time: 1+1+0+1+0+0+0+7+1+2+2+0+1+7=23. Your realization that any date, time, or irrelevant number can be made to equal 23 will be moot.

Capricorn: 12/22-1/19
The stars have been watching you. And your daughter. Oh my, how we have been watching your daughter... Blah, blah, something about a star rising in Orion, blah, blah. The stars will definitely offer you better guidance once that daughter is of legal age.

Aquarius: 1/20-2/18
Every man wants to die a hero. That's human nature. But you have obsessed about it. When little Johnny accidentally starts a fire in his trash can this week, you should calmly walk out of the house with everyone else. If you happen to stand in Johnny's room screaming "take me, I'm the one you want!" That action may be ill-perceived by the police. The firefighters aren't even going to respond; the trash can fire burned itself out without even melting the plastic of the can.

Pisces: 2/19-3/20
Billy-Ray has been wearing that mullet for thirty damn years, so you figured yours would be fine, too. You'll soon realize that Billy-ray can rock that hairdo because he doesn't have to get it near the shake machine at Dairy Queen. You, on the other hand, have to get those lovely locks right up in there. Or, your now-naked scalp did.

Aries: 3/21-4/19
While the police report will read "failed attempt to jump the Grand Canyon", and the coroner's report will read "severe blunt-force trauma", everyone who knows you will know that they should have read "Eh, I think I can make it."

Taurus: 4/20-5/20
Rape. It's a big, scary word. It will also be the most appropriate word for what the biggest guy in jail is about to do to you. Please confer with a Cancer for advice on how to handle it.

Gemini: 5/21-6/21
Yeah, your Lyft driver is also carrying a knife. Unwanted advances will also result in removal of the penis. Keep it in your pants. Unless, of course, the Uber driver already handed it to you. In that case you can wave that thing around like a flag. You're probably not going to get a ride, but you are going to be one in a very exclusive group of men who can 'wave it around like a flag'.